Matrix Key – Relationships – Significant Other 
Mutual Love
“Love isn’t finding someone you can live with…it’s finding someone you can’t live without.” – Rafael Ortiz

“He loves me, he loves me not.”  Can you picture picking the petals off the daisy as you repeat this phrase?  An age old question to be sure, but an ageless question at the same time.  Often we know when we have feelings for another person, but unless the feelings are reciprocated in a mutual love relationship, the relationship will break down.   Mutual love includes those fuzzy good feelings one experiences at the start of a relationship. As the relationship develops, that physical attraction remains, but is reinforced and strengthened as the two people get to know each other on a deeper level. With the WholeLife Matrix, we have identified four elements that define a mutual love relationship:

  1. Attraction
  2. Affection
  3. Enjoyment
  4. Honesty 

Some of these elements may be more important to one partner than the other.  In general, men are more concerned with the physical attraction and enjoyment of shared activities.  Women, on the other hand, generally place a higher value on affection and honesty.  Rather than dismiss the other person’s needs, committed couples find ways to honor and validate their partner’s needs.  And as they say, “what goes around comes around…” when the love is reciprocal and mutual, one person’s happiness can motivate them to acknowledge the other partner’s most important wants and needs.

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Ralph White
Business Coach, Author, Artist & CEO
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